We all know parenting is challenging, but a new survey suggests it might be more fulfilling than the social media algorithm often shows. According to Peanut, an app supporting women through fertility, pregnancy, motherhood, and menopause, 84% of moms feel that the portrayal of parenting in media doesn’t fully capture their reality. But here’s the surprising part: a striking 91% of moms feel more joy and fulfillment than they had anticipated before becoming parents. Despite the challenges, 81% believe that the positive sides of parenting should be celebrated more often in the media.
The joys of parenthood
Peanut’s survey is part of a broader effort to shift the parenting narrative to one that embraces the full spectrum of the experience. The campaign starts with a video showcasing the complexities of motherhood—highlighting both the beauty and the challenges. It moves beyond the typical doom-and-gloom headlines, instead focusing on the moments that bring joy, like morning cuddles, spontaneous laughter, and witnessing a child’s milestones.
For many, it’s the simple moments—like the 62% who cherish morning cuddles or the 57% who find joy in spontaneous giggles—that stand out as the most fulfilling, far outweighing elaborate or expensive experiences.
Changing the parenting narrative
In the early days of social media, parenting content often portrayed a picture-perfect life filled with coordinated outfits and elaborate family vacations. But as platforms evolved and the pandemic unfolded, the narrative shifted. The realities of the “invisible load” of motherhood became more widely acknowledged, and the content became more honest—showing the tears and the tough moments.
This shift was necessary, but somewhere along the way, the focus on the difficulties of parenting became so prominent that the joys were often overshadowed. For many, the message became: “Motherhood is so hard, it might not be worth it.” But Peanut’s survey suggests that the joys of parenting are still very real and worth celebrating.
Embracing the positives
I was once on the fence about having children myself. The stories I read and heard painted an overwhelming picture, and I questioned whether I was ready to take on such a huge responsibility. But after having my baby, I realized it was the best decision I could have made. There’s a fulfillment that comes from those small, everyday moments—when my baby smiles at me, or we have a quiet, cozy cuddle before bed—that makes it all worthwhile. The joy is deeper and more meaningful than I could have imagined.
Holding space for complexity
Of course, motherhood is not one-size-fits-all. Not every woman chooses or is able to have children, and for some, the path to parenthood is filled with obstacles. The current landscape—especially in a post-Roe world—adds another layer of complexity and underscores the need for systemic support like paid family leave and affordable childcare.
Peanut’s survey reveals that 89% of mothers feel current social support systems are insufficient, and this lack of support shouldn’t be overlooked. Parenting is hard work, and societal support is crucial. However, acknowledging the challenges doesn’t mean we should lose sight of the joy that these moments bring.
Finding joy through the challenges
The joy of parenting doesn’t erase the tough moments, but it offers a lifeline—a reason to keep moving forward. Simple moments like my baby’s laughter or the feeling of his little hand holding mine remind me why I took this step, even when it seemed daunting. Let’s shift the narrative again to one that holds space for the challenges but also shines a light on the joy that motherhood brings. Because sometimes, it’s those small moments that give us the biggest reason to smile.
